Give Yourself Permission to Heal

I hate being laid up.

In large part, it’s because it means that something has happened to lay me up, and that’s never a good time, but it also means that I’m usually sidelined in some way until I can get back on my feet.

On Thursday I had a cancerous chunk of skin removed. It was a patch somewhere between the size of a nickel and a quarter ( I couldn’t see it clearly) and it resulted in a 3-4 inch incision, complete with stitches.

So sitting, standing, walking, and a whole host of other, everyday, activities, aren’t at 100% all the time.

I’ve slept a lot, well, more than usual for me and I’ve spent a lot of time off my feet, watching movies and rugby.

I haven’t done much around the house.

I haven’t done any writing. Not since Thursday morning, prior to the procedure, where I finished (I think) the outline for my second book.

This is completely glossing over that I haven’t been on my game, in general, since the procedure, but that doesn’t stop the guilt from rolling in.

Guilt that I’m not pulling my weight around the house.

Guilt that I’m not writing.

Guilt, guilt, guilt.

Even as I type this, I’m finding it hard to accept that I needed the down time to process what’s been going on. Not just healing the physical damage, but getting my brain settled.

I expect I’ll be back at it in the next couple of days, if not tomorrow morning.

There are some things that you can’t just get back up from and, when they happen, I have to remind myself to take the time I need for me, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Time: 2:58 pm-ish

Music: Fit for Rivals – Crash

 

 

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