Slow Going

I like to think I’m a patient person.

I mean sure, that’s a sliding scale for all of us to some extent, and there have been days when I’ve been as steady as a brick wall and other days…well…maybe not so much.

But on the whole, the mental picture I have of myself in this regard is more like a brick wall than, say, a desert landscape.

This book I’m working on? What it’s doing to me? Totally desert landscape.

I don’t feel like I’m doing enough, going fast enough, like I should be farther along than I actually am.

Part of that has to do with me not following my own advice when if comes to social media: Don’t compare yourself to others – What you’re seeing is their A-Game, not the day-to-day stuff.

Another part of it has to do with the extra stuff that I picked up at the beginning of the year. All of those things that I’d been putting off, saying that I’d get around to them. I made a commitment to myself that I was going to stay on top of that, and it’s taking time. It’s also an adjustment, a mental shift to remind myself to stay on top of those things.

Yet another part is that this book is forcing me to stretch as a writer. I hoped it would. I wanted it to do that. So, naturally, it’s not going to go at the same pace as the first book.

I know all of this, but it is still a drag on my mental state. Sure, the desire to push harder, reach farther is a good thing, but beyond a certain point, the focus shifts to how far you haven’t gotten, rather than what you’ve accomplished.

So I’m feeling the former and, to combat the latter, I’ve got two things going for me:

The first is that this is still the beginning of the year. As the year progresses, those things that I’m staying on top of will diminish. Yes, I’m sure that other things will crop up, but what I’m talking about is a backlog, rather than the usual stream of stuff.

The second thing is that, I can feel myself starting to get used to the new normal. As I grow and stretch and adapt, I know that it’ll get easier and that the pace will pick up again.

I just have to keep at it.

Be Safe Y’All

Time: 10:06 am-ish

Music: Blind Guardian – The New Order